Answers

I was the kid who wanted answers, to the point of driving you insane maybe. But still I never took anyone's word for anything and have to find the answers myself. Maybe because I'd been lied to so much. When they told me in Sunday School that miracles were things that happened back in the days of yore, I said why? Did God put a time limit? See I believed what God said, and still do, people I have a big problem with more so if they are "doctors". Modern medicine is no longer about cures but how much money can we make, and how many people can we addict to our products so we have a life time supply of their money. It is more sorcery and witchcraft than it ever was. And hey surgeons love to cut,so they can keep up the life stile, says the woman with 2 torn toator cuffs, one having had surgery the other not. I don't see the difference!!!!
There were other answers I kept asking, but the doctor's arrogance kept telling me that Ground zero had nothing to do with my husband's condition. Well it had everything to do with him dieing!!!!!
But there have been other questions still. How the hell did he get HIV? He lied non stop, even with dementia. Answers came for one event I hounded him about for over 25 years, and it turned out my instincts were correct and he lied. So I just took everything on my instincts that he did for a fact cheat. But still there were questions.
Answers some times come from where we least expect them. My logic about his response in reguarding testing was, he knew he had it and that is why he was so mad at them testing him. Because if you are sure your clean, where is the fuss? Do the test and get it over with! No his claim that it had to wait because my mother had died just then, sounded dumb!!! It was!!! Actually at the grave he was right up there next to my father, staring right into the hole. Had I known he had given it to me right then I would have just shoved him right in with a big oops!!! And let them cover him up. Cruel? Well how is what he did justified?
The answers came last night on a show called the CLOSER, great show. They were investigating a murder, found out the porn star had HIV, ran down that road, and found out he falsefied his work tests. Wife gave them life insurance results. So their logic was if he sent someone to take his work related tests, why did he just run in and do the insurance tests? Why not send his guy in? And then bells were ringing in my head, that was my logic with my husband. See the guy in the show had no idea he was HIV pos, so he just went in and took the test(he was told he was clean a few days before). A person who has nothing to worry about just walks in and does the test. But a person who knows would be avoiding it. And my husband was avoiding it, and when they told him, he refused to tell me. The doctor had to round about tell me, without telling me because it was against the law for him to tell me. But I knew what the message meant. I had to hound him to get him to tell me and even then it was "they think I have it," the doc could then talk and think was not the word used. And so bugging me to death like an itchy rash I had to know. Well he lied about not cheating, claiming it must have been the surgery(14 years before), but I had proof it was not so long ago. I had a negitive test in 2002, positive in 2005.
So I now have proof he lied in the beginning, and he lied in the end. And every where in between. He lied about how he got it, lied that he didn't cheat, lied that he didn't know and NEVER said he was sorry for giving it to me. Which, according to the show's logic and mine, an innocent man just walks right into the test, not a peep out of him in protest. The guilty one kicks and screams all the way to the testing. And so folks if you ever wonder about any partner, there is your answer.
Use your instincts, see through lies. I have lived in one for too long, now I am ready to take a full page add out in the news and tell the world this was a dangerous man.